"Immediately Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He sent the multitudes away. And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. Now when evening came, He was alone there. But the boat was now in the middle of the sea, tossed by the waves, for the wind was contrary. Now in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went to them, walking on the sea. And when the disciples saw Him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, 'It is a ghost!' And they cried out for fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, 'Be of good cheer! It is I; do not be afraid.' And Peter answered Him and said, 'Lord if it is You command me to come to You on the water.' So He said, 'Come.' And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, 'Lord, save me!' And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, 'O you of little faith, why did you doubt?' And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. Then those who were in the boat came and worshiped Him, saying, 'Truly You are the Son of God.'" - Matthew 14:22-33 (NKJV)
It has been an interesting couple of weeks for us. I have not posted in that there has been much frustration from our end around not finding someone able to babysit Tennyson. Travis and I have been taking turns but any business cannot function without a manager 1/2 of every week as ours have lately. We're indebted that they have allowed this for now but know they can't long term. So along with the confusion of why no babysitter is working out is also the financial implications of working each week (between the two of us) unpaid and worrying about our positions in the future. This is all to say I am sorry I haven't updated but was afraid if I did I would go on a two day rant about how this hasn't worked out for us and that wouldn't be a blessing to anyone therefore I decided if I couldn't say something nice, not to say anything at all.
This Friday at work, Linda reminded me however of the passage above, she pointed out that in verse 23 where it says, "And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray." Jesus had sent the disciples away to keep them from enduring the crowd, after He sent the crowd away He headed up the moutainside. He needed to be alone with His Father praying for the disciples, the five thousand He had just fed and Himself. In doing so He never left His disciples, the mountainside overlooked the sea and during the calm and the storm He witnessed and never left them. They were always within His will, even though they didn't know it. Just because they didn't see Him, didn't mean He was no longer there. It's the same with us, just because I don't see Him moving or "feel" His presence in the situation doesn't mean He's not overseeing and interceding to the Father for us every moment of each day. He knows our needs and provides for them. Even though we don't know or understand what is happening right now, doesn't mean He doesn't.
Too often I am upset with myself for asking why, but I think He expects us to. Peter asked Him to show them a sign through Him that He was in fact who He says He is. Though I don't need a sign to know that He's watching and working through us, sometimes I need a nod, a wink or a smile from Him to remind me He's going to see us through, no matter what.
He has shown Himself to us in so many ways through little Tennyson's life that I hate when my head and heart aren't in sync however know that I'm human and He is always with and will always be interceding for me.
Please pray for us and this situation as at this time nothing has materialized by way of a babysitter for Tennyson. Know that we love you all, and I will now post what's been happening in our lives.
Love you all-
Travis, Lindsay and Tennyson
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